National Ex Spouse Day
Did you know there is a day to give recognition to your ex-spouse? National Ex-Spouse Day is officially observed every year on April 14th. National Ex Spouse Day was created in 1987 by Reverend Ronald Coleman of Kansas City, Mo. Considering that the United States divorce rate for first marriages is about 50 percent, there are lots of divorced people in a position to observe this day — if they want to.
You may question why there is such a “holiday” since divorce is often a painful and costly event you are likely to want to just put behind you. However, there are many divorced spouses who can remain friendly and civil even though their marriages did not work out. Some people actually get along better with their Ex once the stresses of marriage are behind them.
The experienced and compassionate Illinois family-law attorneys at Wolfe & Stec, Ltd. understand the difficulties of going through a divorce and dealing with ex-spouses. If you have any problems before, during, or after the divorce process, we can provide professional guidance to examine your individual situation and provide specific strategies to protect you and your children. We offer a free consultation to discuss your options.
Reasons to Observe
There are some reasons for you to observe this holiday – even to celebrate it with your Ex. Here are some for you to think about.
- Celebrate that the relationship is over.
If your marriage was a stressful one, and you have managed to move on, perhaps you both are happier. There is often a sense of freedom that comes with making the move to leave a bad relationship. Try recognizing that there are probably lessons you have learned from the experience that may make you a better person and will help you keep from making the same mistakes in the future.
- Your Ex may have good traits that are worth recognizing.
If you can learn to appreciate the good that each of you saw in each other when you originally fell in love, you both benefit. Some ex-spouses are actually helpful to their Exes – fixing things, doing household tasks, cooperating on things like taxes and financial matters, and of course, parenting any children.
- It is Good For the Children.
It is always better for the children if parents can be civil and cooperate on child-rearing issues. On January 1, 2016, Illinois recognized this by changing child custody laws and terminology for the first time in 37 years. The main purpose of the changes is to support the rights of children and parents to have a healthy and safe relationship with each other and to ensure predictable decision-making for the care of children. Instead of talking about “custody” and “visitation,” the law now speaks in terms of “parenting time” and “allocation of parental responsibilities” to consider the “best interests of the child.”
Parents are asked to take responsibility in determining best practices in the major areas of a child’s life, including:
- Education – choice of school, special programs, or tutors
- Healthcare – choice of health providers and treatments
- Religious upbringing
- Extracurricular activities.
If you and your Ex can cooperate in these areas, as well as come up with a parenting plan and work out a schedule of time you spend with your children, it is reason to celebrate
CONTACT US FOR HELP AND A FREE CONSULTATION
Since issues regarding divorce are so complex and vital to your getting on with your life and the welfare of your children, it makes sense to seek legal counsel to resolve any issues. The skilled Illinois family-law attorneys at Wolfe & Stec, Ltd. know the laws and the system and can guide you through the process. We represent and advise clients in all types of divorce and child custody matters.
We offer a free consultation to discuss your individual divorce issues and answer your questions. For your free initial consultation with an experienced and compassionate DuPage County divorce lawyer, contact us online or call 630-305-0222. We handle cases throughout Illinois and have offices in Woodridge and the entire Chicagoland area.